thanks for choosing god.



speaking of scams...
Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope.











'Who are you?' 'If I gave you my name, you'd get it dirty.'
22 February 2003 : 15.46
What's with guys and their compulsion to call each other "man" all of the time? Sometimes more than once in a single sentence.

Updated my Moi page. You care.

Took me more than an hour to put my exercise bike together last night. I know because I listened to three Goon Shows. But assemble it I did, and now it stands proudly near my computer, so that I can watch movies etc while I exercise. After all, cardio is so dull.

This is spiffy, for people who are into Japan.

Heard from Amy the other night. Always good. She's so nice.

Funny.. the more weight I lose, or rather the lower my percentage of body fat gets, the more cold I am all the time. That's not the odd bit.. that's to be expected. Fat is an insulator, so the more fat you have, the better you are able to retain heat. What's strange is that I've always been too warm. Everywhere I go I'm too warm. So to find myself often too cold is just.. different.

So, a discussion took place on Fark yesterday about attractiveness and geeks. Apparently, this is the difference among those ladies who like geeks (quotes from female Farkers):

"A Geek is a man with border-line fashion sense with a sharp enough brain to have confidence in himself, who has chosen to focus on his insides rather than sit around plucking his eyebrows or pumping-up to no-neck proportions.
The confidence is what helps him get that 'big-Wang' swagger as it were. Geeks gain strength through their talents and skills.
Brains + Confidence = Sexy Geek.
On the other hand,
Brains + Inappropriate Socialization + Self-consciousness to the point of being a drain on your energy = Nerd / Stalker / (fill in the third blank as you will).
Jocks and Musicians who are serious enough about what they are doing, are 'Geeks' in a sense.
Geeks who tend to get more women than your average Engineer."

"Geeks also tend to be a bit on the badass/mischevious/devious side, in my experience."

"... the badass / mischevious part of geeks really should be there too. That's the 'swagger' I meant. If a Mathematician really knows his math, it can become the emotional equivalent of having a very large penis that you have confidence in.
Someone who knows something you don't, and knows it really deeply = very sexy.
Someone who will do your homework for you = Doormat."

Hm. I consider myself a geek, but I don't know whether that applies to me.

Listening to The Slayers soundtrack. Going to the Irish Heather pub tonight. Mmm Guinness..




Perforated blue, black, and white leather Joe Rocket Blaster jacket  I want.
21 February 2003 : 19.17
Do you get the impression that some people might be opposed to this whole war on Iraq thing?

Found my motorcycle school. They even provide the bike for me to use during the course. Which means that I needn't use my own to learn. (Once I get it.) If I were the sort to w00T, I might just do that now.




Priss.
21 February 2003 : 16.01
Yay.. just got the call. The exercise bike is in. I just have to get to the mall before it closes tonight to pick it up. Woo!

Listening to the Bubble Gum Crisis Complete Vocal Collection 1. Really good. :) Excellent sports car music. Even better motorcycle music. Particularly kon'ya wa harikeen and kodoku no enjeru. Needless to say, Priss is a personal favourite.

Anime and manga are so excellent.

Goo Goo Dolls on and up. Must drown out the manbudgie's eating.

Links of interest: the Worldometer. It paints a very depressing picture. One of those numbers, one tiny individual in the ever climbing population, is you. But don't worry. You'll be dead soon.




Click for a larger version.
20 February 2003 : 14.33
Ouch. Headache.

Bahahaha!
Looks like people are trying to do more than just protest bushy. Yay.. you can do it. Get that ridiculous creature out of office and see what can be done about the damage that he and his government have done.

You know, reading Stupid White Men, I'm starting to feel sorry for bush. No, really. He strikes me as someone with the intelligence of a small child. Someone who's being used as a figurehead while his father and cronies operate the country for their own agenda. The impression I get of bush is that of someone who's never had a life of his own. Someone who's always been a tool of his father, and probably other family members, as well. I could be wrong, of course, but to me, the real villains are the members of the administration. bush himself is just someone to be pitied, not hated. That doesn't change the fact that he has to be removed from office, of course.

American Conquest looks like a good game. From what I gather, I can play the British and put down the rebellion in the colony of America. Woo! Or play the Aztecs and beat the Spanish senseless when they come calling. Or I could be the French and.. no, no I don't want to be the French.

People write in to say that I'm too cynical. Yeah, they would say that. Typical.

And now, Skor Blizzardy goodness. Mmm. And tonight I go to comedy night. Huzzah!




Going down...
19 February 2003 : 17.47
Thank god they got rid of Clinton, huh? He created a 236.4 billion dollar surplus. That's 236.4 billion dollars of extra money in the american economy. A surplus of money. Such a thing hasn't been seen.. well, ever. That kind of economic expansion simply can't be allowed. Everyone knows that what a successful country needs is a national deficit of 304 billion dollars, which is what bush has given america. Good thing he got in instead of Gore. Gore would have continued the previous president's policies, and we can't have that, now can we? $236.4 billion today, but who knows where it might have stopped?

Here's what I don't get. They make a big deal out of Clinton's one sort of affair. They say that he's the worst president ever, that he's corrupt and a pervert, etc etc. And yet who's the most popular president in american history? John F. Kennedy. And what was he famous for? He shagged everything that moved. He had affair after affair. There are even stories that he had Mafia associations. And he got shot. It's like getting shot suddenly makes you a hero. It's not how you live, apparently. It's how you die that matters.

If you look at Clinton's presidency as opposed to that of JFK, it was so much better it's not even funny. So why is he such a villain to so much of america? He's the best thing that ever happened to that country.

I've been getting more and more mail from americans who, rather than ranting mindlessly at me, actually have something intelligent to say. I've noticed, though, that the more intelligent the american in question seems, the less (s)he supports bush. So support for bush seems to be inversely proportionate to intelligence. Hardly surprising, though. You know, the more mail I get from intelligent americans, the less I tend to generalise them. The thing is, most of the americans that we get here are the obnoxious ones. Most of the americans that send email, that make the news, in fact most of the most visible americans are the ones that I do so dislike. But I need to keep in mind that not all americans are like that. I've known a lot of americans who are intelligent, not rabidly patriotic, and are actually worth talking to. I tend to forget that, and I really shouldn't.

In other news,
go Chretien!

Is you a gangsta rapper homie fly G thing? Do you know how farking stupid you sound?




Exterminate!
17 February 2003 : 20.44
Went to get the exercise bike. They have to order them in, since they don't keep any in stock. Fuckadoodledoo. But that's ok. I'll get it in the near future. I've survived this long without it. :)

This is brilliant.

Wow.. been working on my brother's site all day. Now I have a brutal headache. Too many hours in front of the computers.




Baiku.
16 February 2003 : 15.23
Big Crunch for lunch. Mmm mmm. And sushi tonight for dinner. Oh, how spoilt I am.

I do like the Big Crunch. So it's a good thing that I'm going to buy the exercise bike tomorrow. I've got quite the home exercise facility happening now. :)

Yuck. At work I sit directly under an airconditioner vent. Which would be nice, you'd think, but not when it's on all freaking winter. I have to wear a coat all day, every day at work. And I'm going to have to start wearing gloves or something because the constant cold draft is making my hands ache. How stupid is that? The problem is that the building doesn't belong to my company, which apparently means that they can't change the airconditioning to suit our demands.
The draft is really unpleasant, though. Still, good excuse for hot chocolate.
Where ya from, you sexy thing?




Engrish.com has t-shirts! I need the 'Shoot my head' one!
15 February 2003 : 13.40



Wow, scary. An Onion article from January 18 2001. It's frighteningly accurate. So go to whitehouse.org, and read the hatemail. It's wonderful. You know what's scary, though? Not that a lot of people are stupid enough to think it's real. That even happens to Standonguard.com. No, the scary part is that some people read the site, think that it's real, and still support it.
americans are freaky. 'specially the religious ones.

Mm.. sushi for breakfast.




A match made in.. uh.. A match made.
14 February 2003 : 17.30
GO AUSTRIA!

And everyone else, too! Hear that, bush? You listening, blair? We can't all be wrong.



The inspection reports are available here.

There's an anti-war protest here tomorrow, but I can't go. Bugger.




Click for a larger version.
14 February 2003 : 14.27
fuck. Didn't get to the sushi place. I made it as far as the pot luck table, and spotted the chocolate cheesecake.




This year, tell her you love her. Do you really need a special day for that?
14 February 2003 : 13.15
I've had the most brutal headache for the last few days, but today, I'm free! Yay me! Finally back to normal.
Shaddap.

Added a random quote script to the atheism page, using religion-related quotes.

Valentine's Day again. And remember kids, if you love her (because let's face it, it's all about her), if you love her you'll spend lots of money. The amount you love her is only shown by the amount that you spend. It doesn't matter what you do the rest of the year, if you don't make some demonstration on this one commercial holiday, you don't care.
feh.
Fortunately, not everyone buys into the commercial messages. The commercials say that if you love someone, you'll buy them something. Chocolate, diamonds, whatever. To me, that's stupid. If you love someone, you don't need a special day to give them a present, and you shouldn't have to give them a present to show them that you love them. If they only way that they know that you love them is through presents, then you're doing something wrong and need to work on your communication skills.
Of course, it's the day for lovers, the day for couples. And it makes the single people so much more bitter. I mean, not all of them. I know lots of single people who are quite content to be single, but there are a lot of single people out there who aren't. And there are plenty of people who do have significant others and can't be with them. Valentine's Day doesn't help. And now here's the day that they can't get away from the constant reminders.
Now people will be saying that I'm bitter. I'm not. I just think that if you're that dedicated, that devoted to your significant other, you should let him/her know more than once a year. To me, there shouldn't be any doubt. Valentine's Day should be unnecessary. As I see it, it takes more than a special day to convince someone that you love them. It should be something that comes through in everything that you do, whether it involves buying presents or not. Just my opinion.


I've been criticised for being too anti-american. Well, yes. But it's not just me. Everyone hates america. Particularly now.
Can you be too anti-america? I think that I'm not so much anti-american as I am anti-america. It's a subtle distinction.
The yankees seem determined to go to war, whether the world supports the decision or not. What's the point of having a United Nations if the big stupid thug is just going to do what he wants anyway? Ok, so america can go to war by itself. That makes a mockery of the whole United Nations concept. The war in Afghanistan is over. The president's popularity is starting to slip again. So they need another war. And bugger anyone who gets in the way.
fuckers. If the rest of the world can see the problem with this idea, what's wrong with america? And by that, I don't mean the american people. Oh, there are those stupid redneck yankees who want to go and blow up innocent Iraqi citizens, but 63% think that america should wait for U.N. approval. That's probably why bushy's approval rating is still slipping. He's at 54% now, from 64% just one month ago. Apparently, it will take more than war to save him.

No, I don't hate americans. I hate the american way, given that it means senseless wars, pointless sabre-rattling, bullying, propaganda, the belittling of other nations, the value of money over everything else including life itself.. the list goes on. But I've met a lot of americans who don't take that nonsense too seriously. Those are the ones who think. I like them. I know plenty of americans that I like. And then there are people like Heather. Do you wonder at my generalising of america when this is the kind of representation you have?

In other news, this comment is directed toward Myriad Genetics, who patented a gene that would help predict breast cancer, and wanted to charge Canadian medical companies ridiculous amounts of money to perform the test.
screw. you. hippies. That's another example of vile american pure capitalism first. Screw people. It's all about the money. Bollocks to you and your health. You're only as healthy as you can afford to be. That's "the american way"(tm)

They've found water ice on Mars. Woo! Unfortunately, in order to convert it to liquid water, they'll need a greenhouse effect caused by carbon dioxide. This means that we'll have to wait until the space program can get manned flights to Mars. The good news is that once we get bush up there we should have liquid water in a month or so. That way he can help to create life, for a change.

Now, I am hungry. It's sushi time. There's an excellent sushi place in the mall near here (I'm at work).




tick... tock...
09 February 2003 : 1.42
Yay! Thinking Yankees!

"Dear God. We paid for all this stuff ourselves, so thanks for nothing." - Bart Simpson - saying grace.

On a completely unrelated note, they say that time is money. I don't understand that.. time is anything but money. Think of it this way: The Mona Lisa, David, Venus, ancient Chinese art, ancient Egyptian art.. all priceless. Why? Because there's only one of each. The more rare something is, the more it's worth. Gold, for example, or emerald, as opposed to granite or water.
But each individual moment in time is unique. The seconds in which I'm typing this will never come again. Each is one of a kind, and when it's gone, it's gone. 1.39 on Sunday, February 9 2003 has just passed, and I'll never see it again. Every moment in time that is to come is unique, something that you experience and then it's gone. Surely that means that it's priceless.. beyond a monetary value. And yet they say that time is money. Is the Mona Lisa money?

People like to think that the more they get paid for each hour of their time, the better they're doing with their lives, but realistically, each moment is worth so much more than money. Until you're making so much that you're not wasting your time doing something that you don't want to do, you're being underpaid. Whether you're making minimum wage or $90/hour doesn't matter. What matters is that you're wasting time. You can't buy time, and you can't buy experience. But you can trade time for experience with a pretty good rate of exchange. If I offered you $90 for the Mona Lisa, you'd think me mad. But many companies will offer you $8 for an entire hour of your life.
That's an hour that you'll never get back, that you can't replace for all of the money in the world.
And people get upset when they lose a couple of thousand dollars in car depreciation.

They say that you have to plan for your future, that you have to work hard now so that you can retire comfortably. And that's probably true, but what's the point? I mean, you retire when you're, let's say sixty-five. And you're wealthy, but too old to do the things that you wanted to do when you were young and working for your future. What I mean is, what's the point of working so that you can retire, when all you'll have to look back on during your retirement is working for the future? What a waste of a life. You can retire, sit in your comfortable deck chair or whatever, and look back at all of the years that you spent in jobs that you hated, stressing and struggling through school, work, and the rest of life, just so that you can sit in a deck chair and look back at all of the years that you spent in jobs that you hated, stressing and struggling through school, work, and the rest of life. What's the point?
Put it this way: it's a commonly held belief in our culture that love is the most important thing in the world.. that the only thing that matters is finding that special someone. Yet I know so many people who are single not because they choose to be, but because they're so busy working that they don't have time for a significant other. So again, what's the point?

The term "wage slave" is tossed around with considerable freedom. People think of it as a semi-serious buzzword, and label themselves that way as a joke, but it's true. You're spending your whole life trying to save money for the sole purpose of having money when you're old. What about now? What about life? If you spend your whole life trying to set up your retirement, all you're going to get out of that life is old age. Wasting your youth on the future so that you can waste your retirement wishing that you'd done more with your past. It seems so pointless.

Time isn't money. You can always make more money. You can never make more time. That makes money cheap, and time priceless.


I have a huge headache. I'm going back to bed.




Click for a larger version.
07 February 2003 : 17.37
Updated McHappy Mail, and Friendly Fire.

Yay america. Your government is definitely acting in your best interests. Honestly, how do people who express such opinions hold public office down there? How is the president holding a national freaking prayer breakfast? Church and state, remember? "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances." (first amendment) That sound familiar? That's what american president Thomas Jefferson described as "a wall of separation between church and state" in a letter to the Danbury Baptists in 1802. If your president is so lacking in impartiality, he's clearly not representing the best interests of a large number of his people. Just think how many americans are not christians. National prayer breakfast, jesus day, prayer for the victims of the World Trade Centre. It's discrimination on the basis of religion, and it has no place in politics.




COW!
07 February 2003 : 16.22
Another run in with girlfriend of brother. I'd like to do an interpretive dance representing my irritation, followed by a performance art piece representing tulips, but I don't have an aardvark. So instead, I'll post something else. Like it or not. Film at eleven.

Went to Malarkey last night to see the brother. How can I put this.. he's brilliant. Seriously, I'm not just his brother, I'm a genuine fan. I love his act, which is always different. I mean, the others who were up were good too, don't get me wrong, but there's just no comparison.
I'm very proud of him. :)

Finally figured out what it was about Dune that was bothering me. They don't use personal shields. I mean, not using shields in the desert I can see.. they attract worms, but in the town? Obviously the town is safe from worms, since it generates a whole lot of vibration. And obviously the big palace building is safe from worms, but no one uses shields inside. Which means that the whole fighting scene where Paul shows that shields can only be penetrated with slow movements was pointless.
I'm not a big fan of Dune, I have to admit. It's well imagined, and very complete, and I like all of the political warfare, but the writing is like sharp gravel. It's just hard to read.. the writing style is almost as important as the words themselves. If you feel like you're swimming upstream, you're not going to enjoy the book as much as if the story just captures you and sweeps you along with it. To me, it's a clumsy writing style if, the whole time, you're aware that you're reading. If you're fighting the medium rather than the story. That's why I never read beyond the first book.

Manbudgie has taken to belching, and.. etc. And making homophobic comments which I find really offensive. Which combines with his constant talking to himself and eating noisily to become really annoying. I don't know whether it's a cultural thing or whether he's just a pig, but I don't want to make things uncomfortable here by saying anything to him, but if he keeps this up I'm likely to vomit on him. I can't move my desk, and neither can he. If this weren't a work environment, I'd just tell him to shut his face.

I have a headache. You all care.




Click for a larger version.
February 06 2003 : 11.57
Ah, tabernac. It's not a real invisibility garment. It's a colour separation device using two cameras and a variation of green screen technology. How disappointing.

Now go here.

Reading on Fark.. someone's claiming that homosexuality is a choice.
Unto thee I say.. fuck off. Being right-handed isn't a choice. Being Blonde isn't a choice. Being intelligent isn't a choice. Being gay isn't a choice. It's genetic.. that's the only way that it could exist in humans as well as so many other species. I mean, doesn't this person know that there are gay whales? Birds?
Bugger. Got to leave. I'll pick this up again later.




Nas ne dogonyat... Tol'ko Skazhe Dal'she nas dvoye Tol'ko ogni Aerodroma My ubezhim Nas ne Dogonyat Dal'she ot nikh Dal'she ot doma Noch' provodnik Spryach' nashi teni Za oblaka Za oblakami Nas ne naydut Nas ne izmenyat Im ne dostat Zvezdy rukami Nyebo uronit Noch' na ladoni Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne doganyat Nyebo uronit Noch' ne ladoni Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat My ubezhim Vse budet prosto Noch' upadet Nebo uronit I pustota na perekrestkakh I pustota nas ne dogonyat Ne govori, im ne ponyatno Tol'ko be nikh Tol'ko ne nimo Luchshe nikak No ne obratno Tol'ko ne s nemi Tol'ko ne s nemi Nas ne dogonyat... Nebo uronit Noch' na ladoni Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat Nebo uronit Noch' na ladoni Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat Nas ne dogonyat'




Holy mother of ass!
05 February 2003 : 16.26
wow.. invisibility. It's been a long time coming, but look at that!

The trekkers must be rejoicing. :) Real cloaking technology.
Sort of.

Close enough, though. I mean, that's the breakthrough. Now it just needs to be refined. Cleaned up, you know. Think of the benefits! They mentioned in the article that surgeons would be able to see through their hands when working, which would help a lot. But more to the point, (depending upon the power consumption), think of the fashions that invisible fabrics will bring about! :)


I've been working on my kung fu, and working out. I need to get back into shape. Other than round-ish. I'm not that chubby, but more so than I would like to be. I'm tired of always being too warm (though I've always been like that). And the greater your fat to muscle ratio, the more energy you have to use to perform any given task. Which is detrimental to kung fu, among other things. Which means that you're always more tired than you should be. So lots of cardio, lots of exercise. A bit of a tune-up.

I've also tired of being shy. So I'm going to change that. I've missed so many opportunities by hesitating, being shy, or polite, or timid. Because believe it or not, I'm actually very shy in person, regardless of how I come across on here. So enough of that nonsense.

And now, we dance.

Come away with me in the night
Come away with me
And I will write you a song
Come away with me on a bus
Come away where they can't tempt us
With their lies
I want to walk with you
On a cloudy day
In fields where the yellow grass grows knee-high
So won't you try to come
Come away with me and we'll kiss
On a mountaintop
Come away with me
And I'll never stop loving you
And I want to wake up with the rain
Falling on a tin roof
While I'm safe there in your arms
So all I ask is for you
To come away with me in the night
Come away with me




Click for a larger version.
05 February 2003 : 11.57
Peter Gibbons: I don't like my job and I don't think I'll go anymore.
Joanna: You're just not gonna go?
Peter Gibbons: Yeah.
Joanna: Won't you get fired?
Peter Gibbons: I don't know. But I really don't like it and, uh, I'm not gonna go.
Joanna: So you're gonna quit?
Peter Gibbons: Uh-uh. Not really. I'm just gonna stop going.
Joanna: When did you decide all that?
Peter Gibbons: About an hour ago.
Joanna: So you're going to get another job?
Peter Gibbons: I don't think I'd like another job.
Joanna: Well what are you going to do about money? Bills?
Peter Gibbons: You know I never really liked paying bills, I don't think I'm going to do that either.

The geniuses at work decided, all sponteneously, that they were going to delete all email older than seven days. Without telling us. Fuck. I had legal stuff in there, correspondence with the RCMP, customer histories, email conversations with friends, the whole history of correspondence with a girl I helped get a job here, reference material.. the list goes on and on. The first I heard of it was the message that arrived that said "In compliance with the new policy, the following folders have been cleaned up:" and the list of all of the messages I'd lost. Thousands of messages. Had they given me some notice, I could have backed the messages up locally, which I never did before because the mail server is supposed to be safe for storing messages. I just love surprises.
Who's the moron who authorises things like that?
Probably the newest moron on the job market.

I've said it before, I'll probably say it again. I'm very fond of them, but the Japanese are weird freaking people. Found a sexy bike. Check out the love.

Compulsory bush-bashing for the day. He's so confused. Someone just take him out of the white house, give him some milk and cookies, and let him go and play in the playground. He's stupid, he's a puppet, and I feel sorry for him.
US budget graph. Who voted for this guy, again?

Going to eat sushi tonight. Yes indeedy. I haven't had sushi in ages, and I need it. I need.
I had roast lamb last night, though. Mmm...




Thus spake the Ackbar, our lord: 'It's a trap!' Amen. Now follow the Bahahahaha link.
02 February 2003 : 12.53
Bahahahaha!!

Jack Chick, a complete freak. An intolerant moron. His original site is here. Prepare to be disgusted and amused at the same time by the stuff this guy has to say. 'specially if you read the one about D&D. That's the best. So parodies are good.

Speaking of D&D, when I was younger, back in the days of high school, I briefly belonged to a D&D group who would hang about in a science lab after school and play AD&D. We weren't allowed to be called "The D&D Club" (lame-ass name anyway) because christians in the school complained about the announcements. So we had to be called "The Role Playing Club." (Also a lame-ass name.)
And then the christians had to go further. Little did I know that the vice principal was a fundamentalist. Yeah, fundamental. He was quite freaked out at the idea of us playing AD&D, even though he had never actually sat in and watched a game. So he first insisted that a teacher had to be present while we were playing. Ok, whatever. The teacher that they chose would sit in the class and fall asleep, so that was ok. Then he brought in a local christian group to bless the room before we started playing. Seriously. Mr Michael was his name-o. And he felt that it was in our best interests to have the science lab blessed before we played a role playing game. This guy was a vice principal, which means that he was entrusted with the well-being of students at the school. What a freak. This is the same guy who, when I got jumped by a large group of guys, tried to suspend me for fighting. That was after the AD&D thing, too. Wonder if they're connected. Religion has no place in school, even after school hours. Keep it in the church. Indoctrinate your sheep.. sorry, flock.. in your brainwashing centres and keep them out of the places where real education is supposed to happen.
fucker.




She kind of looks like a Japanese Emma Peel, don't you think?
01 February 2003 : 12.47
No, it wasn't fucking terrorists!
My god people, you're obssessed!

I had haggis for the first time in ages last night. And it was good. So there.




There can be only.. fuck.
30 January 2003 : 18.19
Pickup lines from Fark:
"Your father must have been a thief, because he stole the stars and put them in your eyes"
"Your father must have been a thief, because THAT'S MY MISSING WATCH!"

But my favourite, because it's so tacky and so stupid:
"Is heaven missing an angel? Cause you got nice cans."

Pickup line generator here, producing such randomness as "Stand back madam, I'm totally about to get my jiggy on." and "Come back! I'm mindlessly holding my pants."

I watched "The One" last night. Some nice kung fu. An interesting premise, but a weak execution. Kind of like "The Matrix." A good idea, but too complex to fit into a two hour movie. If "The One" were a book, it would be really cool. Same with "The Matrix," though at least "The Matrix" is a trilogy.

And now back to your regularly scheduled Clodhopper Blizzard. Mmmm...




Oh here he comes. Watch out boy, he'll bother you. Oh here he comes. He's a manbudgie!
30 January 2003 : 13.01
Who voted for this guy again? Projected US deficit of $199 000 000 000. That's 199 billion, kiddies. Clinton was, in every respect, much better. A better president, a better person. And now he's a villain.
I talked to so many americans, shortly before and shortly after bush became president, who said that they preferred him to Gore. Even dear Jez said that, and she's a sensible girl. Gore would have carried on Clinton's plans. bush is steadily destroying the country. Well, his government. I doubt that the man can tie his shoes without someone to help him.

work work work. I'm tired of this. You know what I want to do? I wanna go rock climbing. Never done that before.. I think it would be fun. Just one of those indoor places would do.

Manbudgie now seems to think that he's a drum machine. [sigh]
He's also taken to repeating things that he overhears other people say. This on top of reading his email out loud. It's funny, but I still need to set him on fire.




Klaatu. Barata. Neko.  :)
29 January 2003 16.34
Listening to Neko Case. Yum. What a voice. If you've never heard of her, go out and listen. And she's nifty, too. I don't care as much for the more country-esque stuff, though it still sounds incredible. But songs like Ketty Lester's "Look For Me" sound so good in Neko's voice.
(It's "Neeko," not "Nayko" like "cat" though Nayko Case has a nice ring to it.)
The fact that she went to school at The Emily Carr Institute of Art & Design in Vancouver doesn't hurt. :)

I've taken to downloading Doctor Who, not because I don't want to pay for the episodes, but because they come out on DVD so slowly. Don't get me wrong, they're well worth the wait. It's just that it's such a long wait. So I download them so that I can watch episodes that I haven't seen in years, and then buy the DVD as soon as it comes out. Good arrangement, I think. :)

In other news: Yay Chretien! Boo Bush.

And along those lines: Bahahahaha!

Now, Ben Harper to celebrate that manbudgie is leaving for the day.




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28 January 2003 : 02.25
Music night at Malarkey. It was good, though watching the guy in the audience who was trying to be a part of the action and couldn't keep time with a watch was amusing.
I've... got rhy... thm! I... 've got... music.../

Procession of events:
[Comment to brother that there was a very cute girl there tonight.]
brother's girlfriend: "You mean the one in the long plaid skirt?"
me: "That's the one. She was awfully-"
her: "People who wear long plaid skirts have problems."
[Discontinue conversation. File girlfriend under "ignore."]
Where the hell did that come from?

Sitting here drinking my lovely new tea. It's really good.. I stopped in at a tea shop today, being in Richmond, and was immediately overpowered and forced to try some King Tea Oolong from Van Cheong. And it was good. Like, really good. If tea were sex.. well, this would be some really good tea, is what I'm saying. And a steal at just over $50/300gms. It's sweet, with ginseng. The scent alone when you open the bag.. mmm. :)

Demands have been coming in for me to post more hatemail. Ok, ok. I'll get around to it. Honestly.
god knows I get enough of it.
Or, at least, he would. You know, if he actually existed.




Ha! I knew it! Evidence that the moon landing was faked!
25 January 2003 : 17.14
Now our access is up and down like a field gravity detector.




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25 January 2003 : 2.50
LAN is still down. Good thing we're not the borg.

Ok, I'm going to take on my non-obssessive fan-boy aspect:
What the hell is up with the borg? They were really freaking scary, with their pale skin and vacant, staring eyes. It was scary how they assimilated subjects by sticking them on the table and swarming around grafting bits onto them. Now it's all unnecessarily textured skin and mean looking hardware and nano-technology. And why do they have designations? Why would you name a part of yourself if you have no one to talk to about it? If you live alone, never having talked to anyone else about yourself, why would you call your hand your hand? Why would you refer to it at all? Why would you have third of five or seven of nine? (apparently, the writers don't know the word "seventh") And tell me this: why the hell would a race that integrated with computers and cyberware, integrated to the point that the individual organisms are just a small part of the whole, where the components of the ship itself can regenerate, why would that species need user interface panels? How can the crew of the Voyager transport to the borg ship and access key systems through external interface panels? I mean, why would the borg have them? You don't have an access panel for your hand, do you? It's the same thing. Everything in the borg world is wired, right? It's all part of the same collective being.
And then there's the queen. Hello? It's a collective. It's a really cool science fiction concept, one that's fascinating and scary at the same time, which has been thoroughly cheapened by the lack of originality of the writers. They should have left the borg at the end of The Best Of Both Worlds, and never used them again. Refer to them, sure, but never see them again. That way they would have remained cool and scary and everything else. Now they're a cliche.
Of course I realise that not everyone who watches the programme is a science fiction fiend, and not everyone actually looks at these things that way, but the reason that I liked Star Trek so much was that it used to be a good blend of pop culture (read "simplified") and good science fiction. Which resulted in pop-SF.. kind of a watered down approach to science fiction. But you still got some pretty cool ideas out of it. SF for the masses. Now it's more like the Red Dwarf approach to science fiction. But lacking the charm and humour.
Having said that, I quite like Enterprise. The only thing that I don't like about it, and this isn't terribly important, but it really irks me that they call the ship Enterprise, rather than The Enterprise. Ships are The whatever, you know? The Victory, The Tiger's Claw, The TARDIS, The Enterprise.
So remember: "Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like no one is watching. Touch like you're someone's uncle."




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25 January 2003 : 12.07
"Drink up. The world's about to end."

Wow.. everything's down. SQHell, or Sapphire, or Slammer- the virus that started at about midnight and has hammered information services all over the world. It's been attacking (surprise surprise) Microsoft servers running SQL, and flooding data pipes so that the rest of the Internet is experiencing problems, too. Think about that. All over the world. Closer to home, the banks are all buggered, our internal network is down (no Internet access at work!), there's no mail, no web, no money. It's a bloody scary situation.
Personally, I blame the terrorists. We all know that they're responsible for everything bad that happens. A building falls down, it's the terrorists. Someone chokes on a pretzel, it's the terrorists. The banks get a virus, it must be the terrorists.
Or Iraq.
Apparently that's what it is.. big evil ugly virus. Yeah, cuz that's a good plan. Write a virus to cut off the money. Idiots. Interac doesn't work, so you can't use your card at the point of purchase at the moment. ATMs don't work, online banking (even if I could get to it) is fuxored. People who write viruum still have to pay rent and buy food.

Hm. Without Internet access my world feels so much smaller.
I can't even get to Google. I can't even get to a news site to read about this. At least my phone still works. I can still send text messages and access the web that way. That's something.

It's a delayed year 2000 bug! Break out the generators! Get to the shelters!

When I was working at Chapters, some old guy came in and started going on about the year 2000 problem, and about generators and storing water and bomb shelters. I told him not to worry, that nothing would happen. He flipped out.. he started going on about how I'd see, and that when everything shut down on New Year's Day I'd remember the crazy guy who was in raving about it.
Well, he was partly right. I remember him. Strangely, he didn't come in again after New Year's Eve.




 Amy.
24 January 2003 : 14.35
You know, spammers wouldn't irritate me so much if they made at least some effort to target their messages. I really have no interest in subscribing to porn sites, increasing my penis size with all natural herbal pills, making money from home, getting more dates, or winning a new car/computer/wife. I don't care people. But at least those ones are in English. Better than the ones that say
A D =?UNKNOWN?B?VjqCoILIgr2CzYKigqKCzIFIjaGUToLMg2+DjIOTg16DQ4OTgUk=?= 3465zuQv9-241hoqu3-17 in the subject line. I only speak one language at present. Target the messages to the appropriate audience or fuck off. Actually, fuck off regardless. If I want your product I'll find you.

Went out with a friend I haven't seen in a while last night. Maybe it was just me, but it felt really awkward. Normally, I'm really very comfortable with her, but not so much last night. [shrug]

I need to call Amy. It's been too long since I saw her, too.




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21 January 2003 : 20.37
Updated my moi page.




Given the choice...
21 January 2003 : 16.41
Added the story of my trip to Seattle.





It's a trap!
18 January 2003 : 14.52
Sorry, Mary, the mother of jesus, was a what?

Through deliberation, a friend and I have determined what is best in the world. It was an intelligent process, and it went like this:
him: (waving a magazine) Is there anything hotter than cool technology and bikini chicks?
me: cool technology and bikini chicks in my room?
him: cool technology and lesbian bikini chicks in your room!

Ah, the path to true enlightenment through intellectual discussion with our peers.


So, Gordon Campbell, Premier of this beautiful province, was caught driving "under the influence" in Hawaii, and everyone's giving him a hard time. As my brother says, "Leave him alone! He could only have killed americans! It's not like he's going after us." My brother further suggests that we get Prime Minister Jean Chretien loaded and send him down to Washington in a semi. :)




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17 January 2003 : 16.10
I found a lovely scooter. Yes, again. Shut up. It's a Bajaj Chetak. Essentially an old Vespa design, but made this year. Yay me!


My brother's girlfriend really needs to stop harassing me about my appearance. Like now. Every time I see her... I'm becoming tired of it. I'm not trendy, sure, but who cares? I have no desire to be an N'Sync clone, or whatever she would have me be. Honestly, diversity, people! It's a simple, two-way arrangement. I don't criticise her appearance, and she shuts the hell up about mine.
Besides, some people (though with questionable taste) think I'm kind of a little cute just as I am.


i'm hungry.




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15 January 2003 : 16.18
Ahhhh! Manbudgie talking to his computer, people eating, people typing, people chattering.. too much noise. It's like claustrophobia, but sonic. It doesn't get to me often, but just at the moment it's too much..
It's an ADD thing. Apparently the ability to tune out the surrounding noises is defective in my head. So, for example, if you're sitting a room with a clock that's ticking, you start to ignore it after a while. I don't. So imagine this in an Internet technical support call centre. Usually it doesn't get on top of me, but sometimes it's just too much and I need to get out

Ok. Calm. Headphones. Offspring. Smash. Really loudly.



late at night she knocks on my door. She's drunk again and lookin' to score../




Please choose the option that is right for you.
14 January 2003 : 18.45
So, a while ago I was talking to a co-worker, and he asked "should gay and straight guys be allowed to use the same washroom?"
Of course, at first I bristled at such an obviously homophobic comment, but then I thought about it for a bit, and started to wonder. Why is it that we have different washrooms for each gender? Is it because we're physiologically different? If so, that's a bit silly, since even children know what the other gender is hiding. Besides, it's not like you see anything in the washroom (thank god). Or is it because of the sexual appeal of each gender for the other, and the intent of avoiding any harrassment. If that's the case, then I'm as much at risk of that from gay males as from straight females. So that doesn't make sense. I mean, separate washrooms are silly, if you think about it. Of course, I know where it comes from really, but these days, the old divisions between men and women are breaking down, so dividing washrooms seems rather stupid. Hell, if women shared the washrooms, maybe men wouldn't be such utter pigs in there. Mind you, given the way things are going these days, instead of "Men" and "Women" there would be "People" and "Ladies Only."

Mmm.. beef heart for dinner, with carrots and onions and things.
No, it's good. Shut your face.
People always freak out at the idea of eating heart, but think about it... aside from being zero fat, and really tasty, it's less icky than the other favourites like liver and kidney. People eat liver and onions and steak and kidney.. so you know what the liver and kidneys do? Ok, so the heart pumps blood. The kidneys remove waste from the blood. The liver produces bile and manufactures blood clotting agents. The only way you're going to get out of this sort of thing is to be a vegetarian, but that's not a good idea since humans developed eating meat products (though a hell of a lot less than we do now). You only have to look at human teeth to see that. You want an all-natural diet? Humans are partially carnivorous. I don't think I could eat an animal after meeting him, so I can understand the motive behind some of the vegetarians (though those who do it for health reasons need to do more research). I've heard it argued, even in my work place, that humans aren't meant to eat meat. heh.. right. That's why there are canines and tearing teeth. Compare human teeth to those of herbivores and those of pure carnivores. Humans are right in the middle. Dopes.




Mrs. Peel, we're needed. On Gallifrey.
13 January 2003 : 20.07
... he who sits inside your head, he who lives among the dead, he who sees you in your bed and eats you when you're sleeping...

Been listening to Doctor Who radio dramas while I work. Lovely. :)
"What are those, Doctor?"
"Cretan urns."
"What's a Cretan Urn?"
"Less than a Grecian."
And, of course, I had to watch the Avengers today. John Steed and Mrs. Peel.. such an excellent combination. Reminiscent of the fourth Doctor and the second Romana.




My wee beetle!
12 January 2003 : 23.45
Found a picture of my beetle :) His name was Heinz.
He went to live with someone who restored him to lovely condition. Such a cute little thing.




Give it up! W00t!
11 January 2003 : 18.28
Ok, how about a big hand for my
NEW INTERNAL DVD BURNER! YAAAAAAAAYYYY!!
Thank you.
It's very pretty.





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10 January 2003 : 14.08
Best. Description. Ever.
If I may indulge in a little egotism for a moment. :) I was talking to a friend the other night, and it went like this:
She: "... yeah, well you have a great look."
me: "Not at all. I'm hideous."
She: "Not the way you look, stupid. Your look. Your attitude. It's kind of a combination of perpetually amused and kinda.. I don't know. Predatory."

I like that. Yes I do. That ranks right up there with "Your young man. He's got the devil in his eyes."




by any other name...
09 January 2003 : 10.16
[sigh]

The next two weeks are going to be really long.




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07 January 2003 : 19.42
Started redecorating my basement.. painting and all of that. I had a friend who was going to help me, but that doesn't seem to have happened. You can only wait for someone for so long, after all.

I'm going to bed.




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07 January 2003 : 11.58
Wow.. check this out!
(with sound) It works better if you save it locally and play it. Otherwise the end cuts off. Don't blame me... I didn't encode it.




Autobots! Transform!
06 January 2003 : 19.41
It's a trap!

You are The Admiral Ackbar!
Take the "Which FARK Cliche Are You" quiz!


Now read this. I'm going to get some exercise.




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06 January 2003 : 13.34
Grr. I hate trying to have an intelligent discussion with people who refuse to listen. We're talking about marriage. I say that humans are not a pair-bonding species, which you can see by looking at chimpanzees. They say that chimpanzees are not humans. Ok, a very weak argument given how incredibly similar humans and chimpanzees are. However, I'll let that one go.. maybe they aren't up to date on the research. They say that humans must be a pair-bonding species because they get jealous. I say that that's just because they want their genes to survive as best they can, and in order to do that you don't want your mate to stray. They say well, where did marriage come from, then? That's pair-bonding. I say that marriage is a religious institution, and that not all religions require a marriage of only two parties. Look at the middle east. They say that it doesn't matter because it was humans who created the pair-bonding sort of marriage, so it must be natural. I say that non-pairbonding behaviour comes from instinct, while pair-bonding behaviour comes from religion and convention, and that obviously instinct is common to all humans, which is why hot all humans pair-bond. I say that religion and convention are nothing like as inherently a part of human behaviour as instinct. I say that this is why even in societies where pair-bonding is recognised and even required, individuals tend to stray in order to continue mating with multiple partners. They walk away in a huff. Feh.




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06 January 2003 : 12.21
Once again, the panto is over. It's always so sad when it comes to an end...
We got huge applause and had fireworks during the finale of the final performance. It was very cool.
I love panto.

Mmm.. wasabi peas for breakfast.




Vroooooom
02 January 2003 : 13.11
I have this sudden urge to be flying along an open highway in my car with my stereo playing Goo Goo Dolls very loudly, with my sunroof and all of my windows open. Not going anywhere. Just going. :)




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02 January 2003 : 9.27
Oh, jeez.. my mistake. How thoughtless of me. I said some really harsh things about that guy this morning, and I should really correct my mistakes. My only excuse is that I was tired. I meant to say that he is a leprous cockmaster with all the wit, charm, and sophistication of a partially digested slug. Everything else still applies. Sorry for any confusion that I might have caused there.

Ok, now that that's over with, I can get on with other, more important matters.
Rule #17: always keep your oppressed, unwashed masses well fed. It's difficult to be an angry malcontent when you're pleasantly full after dinner. Four out of four dictators agree that rebellions are a terrible inconvenience when you're trying to take over the world. They quite ruin your weekend.

christ, I'm bored. Bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored bored. I'm so bored I didn't even use copy/paste to type that. That's how bored I am. I'm so bored I feel the need to write about how bored I am on my website. That's pretty friggin' bored, you know. There's cold, and then there's cold. Like, there's the cold like "oh, that's a chilly draught. I should put on a sweater." and then there's "Holy jesus fucking christ in a furnace! Which is where I wish I were because I'm freezing!"
The deep, penetrating cold that chills the bones and causes not just significant shrinkage, but full out retreat. I'm that bored. With everything.

Saw Orange County. How sad.. how very sad. I'll never get those 82 minutes back. Schuyler Fisk is really cute, though. :)




'I'd like you to meet my new boyfriend...'
02 January 2003 : 00.08
So, another Violently-Happy New Year. 2003, and jesus still hasn't shown up. I mean, I'm frequently late for work myself, but this is a bit extreme, don't you think?

Started the new year with sushi. (good) With a kind-of ex-girlfriend and her new boyfriend. (not so good).
I hate public displays of affection, even at the best of times. Sometimes, though, they make me violently ill. The sort of ill that suggests that a cute little alien is going to pop out of my chest in a cute little explosion and do a cute little tap routine right in the middle of the california rolls.
Perhaps I over-react. Perhaps not. But either way, it's my reaction, so sod off.
It wouldn't be so bad if I had been warned ahead of time that the slimy-yet-hairy new boyfriend would be there. Then I could have gracefully bowed out of the sushi experience. But he was such a charming surprise, lacking only the bow on the top. I must remember to thank her for that. People can be so considerate, can't they just? Of course, you'd need a machete to place the bow. The guy's like a large tarantula who's just starting to pluck in a real effort to clean himself up. Dude has a haircut that would make Shaggy proud, and all of the social skills and graces of a decaying zebra carcass. Except, of course, for the smarmy [lack of] wit, which was surely grafted from a particularly well-lubricated used car salesman. No, really. This chap is a fountain of useless facts, unamusing quotes, and urban legends that we've heard only thirty-six times before (citing them as true, of course). Yes, a humourless, drawn-out anecdote for every occasion. A witty reparte so subtle you won't even notice it, and will take from the encounter only the impression that he's a complete twonk. Book him now for your party or function, ladies and gentlemen. I'm sure he's available.
They say that love is blind.
christ, it must be.
Of course, there's the possiblity that I might be a touch biased.
But recalling the experience, I really doubt it.
I suppose it doesn't matter. But it certainly seems to.

[sigh] I need a change. A seriously large-scale change. I'm tired of everything as it is. I need to move away from everything and everyone I know, and just do things differently for a while. I'm not unhappy. I'm just.. I don't know. Restless. Taken by the wanderlust, I suppose. I'm no longer content, at any rate. Maybe I could just change something small.. my car, my job, my social world... something to make life interesting again. I feel right now as though I'm just going through the motions, you know? The same thing each day, even with the show.




Happy xmas, etc.
24 December 2002 : 22.27
Happy christmas, and all of that. First snow of the season today, too. Pretty.

(no, americans, it doesn't always snow here. And we don't live in igloos, either.)




Click for a larger version.
23 December 2002 : 13.25
Dear santa,

All I want for christmas is the list of naughty girls.

sincerely,
-w




Click for a larger version. You pervert.
19 December 2002 : 12.46
Shut up.

So the show is going well. But I'm getting no sleep.. I'm so tired. You know when you're so tired that you feel like you're spinning when you close your eyes? That was yesterday. I'm far more tired than that now.

I've been messing with my makeup again.. I'm completely gold now, with shadows around the eyes, big black eyebrows with red glitter all over the place, and lowlights so that I have a constant smirk. It's good. :)

My dear friend Elizabeth gave me a Lava lamp for christmas last night. Yay! It's so cool.. sort of a teal colour. Very nice. :)

Off to do another show tonight. I love the theatre, but three hours of sleep every night for a month is brutal. Thank god I have wasabi peas to see me through.

Next plan: lift the soundtrack of GTA 3 radio stations, including Chatterbox, to a standard audio CD so that I can play it in my car. Good luck finding time, though.

The manbudgie who sits next to me at work is excited about something. No idea what, but the chattering has picked up in pace and volume.. (he's a manbudgie because he talks to himself, chuckles at nothing, talks to his computer, eats noisily.. he reminds me of a budgie. Of course, I don't have any urge to drown a budgie, so the analogy only goes so far.)
Maybe I could get him a bell and a mirror to play with. That would keep him occupied.




The Star Trek version of the Dyson Sphere
12 December 2002 : 11.15
Ah, coffee. Just the way I like it.. two lumps, no sugar. :)

The show goes well.. I've been fiddling with my makeup and have an exciting new toy. I make myself up green, but with the amber lighting they're using on me, I'm washing out white. To conserve life-hours, we've got the black light on throughout the show. The lovely and talented Charmaine, the theatre's resident makeup expert, found some intensely neon green, black light reactive makeup that I'm airbrushing on. It makes me look like a complete freak, which is good. Tonight I try it for the first time in front of an audience, and we'll see how it goes.

Present fascination: The Dyson Sphere. Totally impractical.. the amount of resources and labour required to construct such a thing would necessitate the cannibalisation of an entire solar system, I'm sure. That's assuming that you had a matter resequencer of some sort. It's particularly difficult to conceive if you were to consider trying to construct the popular solid version (like the one that appeared in Star Trek:TNG). That's not even considering the time involved. But still.. the benefits would be incredible. I am, of course, assuming that a species with sufficiently advanced technology to construct such a thing could do something about the stresses to the shell. Again, assuming that we're talking about the solid version that's so popular. The major benefit of that version of the sphere, of course, is the inhabitable surface area. wow.. no population problems ever again. Assuming an Earth-orbit sized sphere, we're talking about roughly 600 000 000 times the surface area of Earth. 6 billion people? You could wander for several lifetimes and not meet a soul. Imagine the terraforming work.. a mountain range here, a desert there, here a rainforest, there a rainforest.. of course, how you manage the incredible heat energy generated in such a closed system, I don't know. Entropy definitely applies. And then there's gravity, weather, communication with the far side of the sphere (what with the sun being in the way).. but still..

Yeah I'm a geek. Shut yer face.

On an almost totally unrelated note, I read a short Doctor Who fanfiction story based upon the premise that "fuhrer" translates literally into "Master."
What a great idea, given Hitler's apparently almost hypnotic oratory skills. :)

Now do this. I'm going to get some more coffee.




Nippon!
09 December 2002 : 19.40
I just realised that the list of toys I need to buy is huuuge.
They say that money can't buy happiness. "They" obviously don't have enough of it.




How shall we fuck off oh lord?
09 December 2002 : 14.36
[sigh] Stupid americans . This is to be expected from the bible belt, I suppose, but still...
Only in the southern US.

Now, play this.

Wow I'm tired.. I must have spent about thirty-six hours at the theatre yesterday. And thirty-six the day before, as well. First audience tomorrow night. Pictures in the near future.




Dive! Dive! And then.. um.. hard to port. Am I going hard to port yet? Does it matter? I can't see the bloody thing.
06 December 2002 : 11.07
So there's this couple in the panto.. they've just become engaged, and they're still in the first spasmodic throws of sweetness. I was talking to the director of the show, and she was saying how sweet they were, and how adorable, and how they have "this glow about them." So I, being the hopeless romantic that I am, mentioned the Second Law Of Thermodynamics and speculated on how long it would take for the relationship to experience heat death.

The guy beside me insists upon eating at his desk.
He's a very noisy eater.
Carrots, nuts, lots of crunchy things.
How long until I spackle his mouth closed so he shuts the hell up? Only time will tell.

[sigh] I'm sitting here completely surrounded by no sushi.

I found a company that sells radio controlled submarines.
Why?
I mean, what's the point? When the thing is on the surface, it's a boat. When it submerges, you can't see it anyway, so why bother? "I'm going to port!" "where?" "Over there. Somewhere. Underwater." "Wow. Exciting."

I'm supposed to go to a party tonight, but smegging hell I'm tired. Like four hours of sleep every night this week, and up at 6 am.
6 am. Who the hell invented 6 am? Sick bastard.
Anyway, to party, or not to party? You know I won't get home if I do go, and I have to be at the theatre at 10 the next morning. Ghastly. I theenk I go home eenstead. Have a nice early night for a change.




I NEED!
04 December 2002 : 09.46
Wow.. it's been ages since I updated this site. I've been busy, so shut your face.

Actually, the amount of complaints I got about not updating was quite surprising. You like me! You really like me!

I don't think that anyone can realise just how cool this is.
And along the same lines, my mother's theatre needs one of these. I think that the coolness quotient is unknowable to anyone who doesn't have one. Except me, because I'm an expectant owner.
Of course, I'll have to put flashing LEDs on it.

Wow.. so much has happened since I last updated this site. I mean, I've...

um...

Well, I've been busy.
Actually, I have been. What with rehearsals for the show, going out with friends, parties, the occasional sushi experience, work and sleep and working out (again, finally) I've barely had time for anything. But here I am. [pirouette]

Ok, back to work. More later.




Click for a larger version.
19 November 2002 : 13.25
Things to do today:
  • wake up and realise that head hurts... check
  • stand up... check
  • get dizzy and fall over backwards... check
  • mutter something unpleasant about Newton's questionable parentage... check
  • stand up again... check
  • fall over sideways, smacking head against desk... check
  • crawl over to phone and call in to work sick with a migraine... check
  • go back to bed... check




  • Now boarding, Platform 9 3/4
    17 November 2002 : 21.00
    So I saw Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets last night. Wonderful! Now I'm going to have to read the books, of course. Naturally, I had to go out and buy the DVD of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. :)

    Of course, trust the religious right to demonstrate the true ignorance of the dark side.
    Perhaps "dark" gives them too much credit. I think that "dim" suits these people far better, don't you?
    The preacher states that Harry Potter books will "make you dirty." I should point out that his religion is the one that's compelling him to burn and shred books. Rather Nazi-esque behaviour. This is better than pagan religions how, exactly? Imbecile.

    The Japanese are very weird people.

    And now, Tiny Ninja Theater, performing classics of the theatre for your entertainment.





    Click for a larger version.
    12 November 2002 : 19.36
    Violent headache persists.. has done all day. I think I go to bed now.




    Isn't he beautiful? Take a good look, because you won't get another. The americans have just guaranteed his extinction.
    12 November 2002 : 13.34
    When I say I hate americans, it's for a number of reasons. Here's one of them.
    america supports the ivory trade. america is creating a demand for ivory. That demand will lead to further poaching of elephants. americans are the biggest consumers in the world. america will therefore be responsible for the extinction of the elephants. Bastards. Filthy, repugnant bastards who care more about money than anything else in the world. Money is not more important than the lives of innocent creatures that do no one any harm.
    The elephants shouldn't be the ones hunted to extinction. There should be a trade in Yankee ivory. Let the money-chasing wretches be endangered, and spare the innocent animals that they have condemned.




    Evil bastard of a headache.
    11 November 2002 : 22.26
    First photo and makeup shoot. Demon makeup was well received. :)

    Violent headache. Bed.




    Testing the prosthetic ears and horns.
    Full detail, sans glitter, from one angle.
    and from another angle.
    From last year. It's a similar look, but this year I'm going to be younger. Again from last year.. the colours will be far more bold this year, though.
    10 November 2002 : 13.29
    Publicity shoot for the show tomorrow, so I'm experimenting with makeup to see what I can do. I've had to tweak the makeup design from last year by quite a bit, since I've lost so much weight. Lots of prosthesic bits this year. :)
    The pictures are without the base, which will be green. I happen to like green. The red around the horns will have to be blended in. Hmm...
    Probably stick a small gold hoop through the top of one of those ears, too.
    I'll probably add red glitter to the lower lip and below the eyes, and trace the outside of the eyebrows with it.

    Gah. The quickcam doesn't pick up the details. I'll have to take some pictures with my digital camera, for reference when I'm actually doing it.

    I've had some questions about the makeup I did last year, so for those who are interested, here's what I've done this year:
    White lipstick to highlight the cheeks, smudged upwards and inwards to add dimension. Then black eyeliner to define the same lines, smudged downward for a shadow effect. The idea is to give a constant smirky effect.. normally the Demon King has a narrowed face, with hollowed cheeks and a long, shadowed nose. Riiiight.. my face is far too round to make that practical.. maybe a professional could do it, but it's beyond my talents to produce that kind of illusion. So instead, I decided to use my shape, and go for that permanently amused look. More evil anyway, I think, and it makes the audience dislike the demon more for being smug. The eyebrows and eye shadowing are black lipstick, which is my best friend when I'm doing demon makeup. :) It's easily applied, and easily smudged to whatever dispersal you prefer. Keep in mind that this is all against green, so it looks much better then than it does in the pictures. The little devil's beard is just eyeliner. Nothing special there. I might grow a real one.. haven't decided yet. It would look far more real, but I do have to live with it outside the show. The horns and ears are secured with liquid latex, applied with the tip of the handle of a silver spoon. No special reason for that.. it's all I could find that would fit into the bottle. I'll also probably use prosthetic fingernails, which are about half as long as my fingers and black. If I do, I'll coat the tips and undersides of them with spirit gum and dip them into my glitter pot. That way I get a nifty flash of red with every gesture. I'll just secure them with invisible tape.. nothing else seems to hold. The sideburns and widow's peak are black lipstick, too, though I think I'll use eyeliner next time. It blends better with my own hair colour. Hm.. do I want to dye my hair black for the show? To apply the glitter, I take a small pot and mix a lot of glitter with a little hair gel. Give it a bit of time to dry, and then apply it with a toothpick, and you can get very fine detail out of it. Good for lining eyes and things, and it doesn't do you any damage when you stick it to your lips. Final touch, a tiny bit of smudged black at the corners of the mouth, just to tweak the normal expression into a smirk.

    Don't you feel better for knowing this stuff? :)




    Well general, ah recon y'all need a bigger military budget so we kin git yuh some naht vision. Ah kin hardly see them terrorists.
    09 NOvermber 2002: 20.08
    Immaculate conception! (Or holy fuck, if you prefer)
    It's been ages since I updated this site. I plead busy.. so much to do these days, and so little time in which to do it. But here I am. You all care.

    Yes you do. Shut up.
    Ok, so dear bushy has been coining his own new words again. You remember when he said "We're working with Chancellor Schröder on what's called 10-plus-10-over-10: $10 billion from the U.S.,$10 billion from other members of the G7 over a 10-year period, to help Russia securitize the dismantling - the dismantled nuclear warheads," right? Well, he was on the radio the other day talking about how the Al Queda was just out there, livin' in caved, kinda oochin' about. That's at least the second time he's described something as "oochin'."
    The business reporter was on next, and described the economy as oochin' toward a bull market. :)
    Yes, she was making fun of him.
    You know, between oochin' and securitising and all of the other words he makes up or misuses, it's a wonder the guy can make himself understood at all. How many speech writers does the white house go through? I can just see him, standing up there... "fool me once... shame... shame on you..." while the poor speechwriter stands at the back of the auditorium weeping. "I worked for hours on that speech. It was perfect. It had all of the elements.. courage, sadness, it tugged at the heart at the same time as it fired the spirit, and in five seconds he destroyed it! I can't work like this! I'm going to work for Barney. At least he gets his lines right."

    Ok, going to complain for a moment:
    Ow.. big evil nasty headache. And my coffee's gone cold.

    So, I was going on about abortion, and the pro-life attitude toward abortion. Pro-lifers are almost exclusively religious.. christian, or some variant thereof. They're the ones who have been doing the killing of the doctors who operate the abortion clinics. A friend of mine said that he wasn't sure when life begins, but he's pretty certain that it's before the fourth year of medical school. To me, the whole stance that the christians take makes little sense. They say that god has a problem with abortion, right? So explain this:
    Hosea 13:16 "Samaria shall become desolate; for she hath rebelled against her God: they shall fall by the sword: their infants shall be dashed in pieces, and their women with child shall be ripped up."
    Hm. So women who aren't pregnant are ok, but those who are should be killed. This shows that the intent is to kill the foetus because god doesn't feel that these are desirable pregnancies, for whatever reason. Looks to me like god not only has no problem with abortion, but that he actually commands it. Remind me why the pro-lifers are opposed to abortions again?

    So I saw Bowling For Columbine. It's brilliant, and anyone who hasn't seen it should do so immediately. Especially americans. It's not a big america-bashing film, it's a documentary about america's obssession with guns but more than that, it's about fear. It shows how fear drives consumerism. It shows how fear leads to violence. It takes a good, hard look at the america in relation to the rest of the world in Michael Moore's typically confrontational and unflinching fashion, and it's very informative as well as being both frightening and entertaining. Check out the site. View the flash intro. Read the facts.. scary stuff. The crowd applauded at the end of the film. Some people left laughing, others in tears. Check this out:

    Yearly firearm homicides:

    Germany: 381
    France: 255
    Canada: 165
    United Kingdom: 68
    Australia: 65
    Japan: 39
    United States of America: 11 127
    Want to know why?




    The Freedom Of The Press survey. How about that CNN?
    25 October 2002 : 11.15
    I've been spending too much time bashing americans and america recently. It makes it sound like I hate them all, and that's not the case. I know a lot of really nice, intelligent americans. So I should clarify: I don't hate americans, I hate america. It's not the people, it's the attitude and the government. Of course, some americans I can't stand. Ok, the majority of americans I can't stand. america is not the greatest country in the world. It isn't the land of the brave or the home of the free, and those who claim it is are fooling themselves. Never have I encountered a group of people with so much arrogance and egotism, and with so little justification. I mean, when I was younger.. eighteen, nineteen, or thereabouts, I joined Mensa. I had heard such wonderful things from members, so I was all excited about the idea... here were people who were intelligent and well educated. Your IQ has to be in the top two percent just to get in. Imagine the things they could produce! Imagine the changes they could make to our world by harnessing that kind of mental power, that kind of intelligence and knowledge. Just think of the wonderful things we could accomplish!

    Yeah.. it turned out to be a lot of standing around going
    "Goodness, Sedrick, aren't you intelligent?"
    "Why yes, yes I am, Reginald. As, indeed are you."
    "Ah, you're too kind. And, of course, absolutely correct."

    feh. Ridiculous behaviour that just goes to show that even the most intelligent people aren't free from elitist pettiness. Imbeciles. What a waste..

    The point is that compared even to that, america is bad. Stop telling everyone how great you are, and start showing us. If you tell us, we won't believe. If you show us, we'll have no choice, will we? But you know that won't happen. As good as america might have been at any given point, it's sliding rapidly downhill, and picking up speed since 11 September 2001. Fanaticism, paranoia.. there's so much that america's got going against it at the moment, and the present government is just making it worse in so many ways. It's turning the country into a theocratic dictatorship, a country run by an ever more powerful government that's systematically taking away the rights of the people under banners of national security, patriotism and, ironically, the ever-popular generic american "freedom." The people in question challenge everything to be compatible with their constitution, even as their government systematically dismantles it, and the rights it guarantees. They argue over stupid things like the pledge of allegiance while they lose their right to freedom of speech, freedom of assembly, and so much more. Like Mensa, I frequently hear from americans about how great america. Like Mensa, with their resources they could be an incredible force for good. Like Mensa, what they actually are is a tragic disappointment.

    You know, that argument carries a lot less weight when viewed like this.




    repeat the mantra... america is the greatest country in the world. War is necessary to destroy evil. Pacifists, critics, and atheists are not patriots. Repeat.
    23 October 2002 : 19.02
    [whew...] Working out.. I haven't done any serious cardio in some time. My legs hurt.

    Ladies, fear not! PMS is a thing of the past! Headaches? Ha! No more! Eating disorders? Never again! Because according to W. David Hager, author of Stress and the Woman’s Body, the cure for these things and more is "the restorative power of Jesus Christ in one's life"
    He must know what he's talking about, right? I mean, the bushy government wants to make him chairman of the Food and Drug Administration's panel on women's health policy. I mean, yes, ok, he's an ob-gyn but he doesn't prescribe contraceptives for single women, or RU-486 (and actually wants the american Food and Drug Administration to make it illegal). Ok, so he won't do IUDs or abortions. Yes, so he included the essay "Using The Birth Control Pill Is Ethically Unacceptable" in a book for which he was editor. Let's forget all of that, shall we? You know, american ladies, that the government is doing what's best for you, right? You know that church and state are separate, and that the religious beliefs of the government officials in charge won't deny you, and other women all over the country the kind of medical assistance you need. That's why the government of america is spending USD$100 000 000 on promoting marriage, and a further USD$135 000 000 to teach abstinence in place of sex education in high schools. And that's a good idea, right? After all, if you tell hormonal teenagers not to have sex, of course they won't. And the bush government is spreading that kind of common sense the world over, and thank god for that. Now, the UNFPA (United Nations Fund for Population Activities) won't get that USD$34 000 000 they were promised so that they could distribute contraception and provide sex education in the third world nations, where population is way out of control and HIV is running rampant. After all, sex education just promotes sexual activity, right? Take away the education, and the people won't do it. That must be the reason that the bush government's first day in office they instituted a rule that that no foreign aid can go to any women's clinic abroad that that mentions the word "abortion," even when that means risking the life of the mother. Stand fast, georgie! Take the hard line and show those pregnant women how loving jesus really is.
    Even if it kills them.

    Of course, you don't hear about this kind of thing going on. Fortunately, there's a sniper on the loose who's eating up all of the american media's air time, so there's nowhere to mention the really very unimportant details of changes to the national women's health policy. What convenient timing. After all, you don't want to be bothered with silly things like that, right ladies? You trust your government to look after you, right?

    On the subject of contraception, I found this article, which talks about a new condom from Durex. Apparently, the condom contains benzocaine, which is a mild, topical anaesthetic. The idea being to desensitise the relevant bits in order to make sex last longer.
    I'm forced to wonder: why? I mean, if you're anesthetised, what's the point? "Ooh, look, I can go on for an extra hour. Can't really feel anything, though."
    Now, maybe I'm just old-fashioned, but I always thought that sex was supposed to be sensual. You know, like of the senses.
    Oh! London Symphony Orchestra is playing Mozart's "Ein Mädchen oder Weibchen!" I love that piece! Where are my earplugs?

    A remarkable breakthrough for capitalism, and a bit of a set-back for medical science. Some stupid yankee company (mentioning no names, but their initials are Myriad Genetics Inc.) has patented two genes that can signal the development of breast cancer. The stupid yankees now want USD$3500 to do the test that could potentially save a woman from having to have her breast(s) removed, or worse. Go capitalism. As I've said before, money is more important than life to the americans. That's fine, whatever.. people can leave the country, if they like, and come somewhere civilised. But now nasty american money-grubbing greed is affecting non-americans. Fortunately, though the BC Cancer Agency has been threatened with legal action, they're forwarding the tests to Ontario, which is rightfully ignoring the patent. Actually, every province is ignoring the patent except BC. Come on, BC.. stop bowing and scraping before the horrid, hated americans and their money. Yes, our economy is still weak, yes we can really use their wealth, but not at the expense of people's lives. I had a friend with breast cancer, so this hits rather too close to home.
    Patenting genes.. fuck off, america.




    click for The Sushi World Guide
    20 October 2002 : 18.36
    Going for feesh tonight. I do so love the sushi. It's better than sex.

    Ok, so that's not true. Only the tuna sashimi is better than sex. Shut up.

    Another new page. There's really no pattern as to when I start a new page.. just sort of whenever it seems like the current one is taking too long to load.

    I got tickle assaulted today. I was minding my own business sitting upside down on a chair when I was attacked by thirty tickling fiends! I fought for my life against the savage horde, but they were too strong for me.
    OK, when I say "thirty" I actually mean "three"
    But they fought like thirty! The demons!

    Listening to a dance mix of the Golden Axe theme, shamelessly pilfered from Overclocked Remix.
    Ooh, and here's a Mortal Kombat one that doesn't have gratuitous "Mortal Kombat!" shouts all the way through it. And one of Castlevania. Ah, the classics.






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